Category: Catholic

It is perhaps some congenital defect in us, or perhaps just a byproduct of our Western affluence — having lived all our lives in a land where true hardship is virtually unheard of — that we forget the important things. Every year, at about the same time, we obsess over idiocies ranging from stupid judge tricks to immaculate lizard conceptions. 🙄 How all this tomfoolery came about in the first place is anyone’s guess; and it really doesn’t matter anyway.  What does matter is the real “reason for the season” and so, this being Christmas Eve and all, here it is:

In those days a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that the whole world should be enrolled. This was the first enrollment, when Quirinius was governor of Syria. So all went to be enrolled, each to his own town.

And Joseph too went up from Galilee from the town of Nazareth to Judea, to the city of David that is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and family of David, to be enrolled with Mary, his betrothed, who was with child.

While they were there, the time came for her to have her child, and she gave birth to her firstborn son. She wrapped him in swaddling clothes and laid him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.

Now there were shepherds in that region living in the fields and keeping the night watch over their flock. The angel of the Lord appeared to them and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were struck with great fear.

The angel said to them, “Do not be afraid; for behold, I proclaim to you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For today in the city of David a savior has been born for you who is Christ the Lord. And this will be a sign for you: you will find an infant wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger.”

And suddenly there was a multitude of the heavenly host with the angel, praising God and saying: “Glory to God in the highest and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”

When the angels went away from them to heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let us go, then, to Bethlehem to see this thing that has taken place, which the Lord has made known to us.”

So they went in haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the infant lying in the manger. When they saw this, they made known the message that had been told them about this child. All who heard it were amazed by what had been told them by the shepherds. And Mary kept all these things, reflecting on them in her heart. Then the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen, just as it had been told to them. When eight days were completed for his circumcision, he was named Jesus, the name given him by the angel before he was conceived in the womb.

Merry Christmas, everyone; and God bless.

Well, now… I was wondering if (or should I say, when?) this was going to happen. You know that the Loopier Left is starting to get all nervous and freaked out when they start recycling — yet agaaaaiiiinnn — the old “a Conservative government will mean the end of the world!!” canard. 🙄

Yeah, it’s back. But it wasn’t the Grits that dug up this corpse, sowed it together, and ran a few volts through it this time. That was a bit of a surprise.

Going pear-shaped

Danny Williams may be something of a superhero back home in Newfoundland but the rest of us are starting to wonder if his cheese hasn’t slid clean off his cracker…

ST. JOHN’S, N.L. — Premier Danny Williams levelled his most blistering attack yet against the prime minister, telling a business audience yesterday a Stephen Harper-led majority government would mark one of the darkest eras in Canadian history.

Williams escalated his public feud with Harper, warning voters the Tories would stoop to any depths to implement their hidden “right-wing, Conservative-Reform party” agenda.

“The only reason we haven’t seen his full plan for Canada implemented is because he had a minority government to keep him in check,” Williams said. [Be afraid! Be veerrryyyy afraid!!! -D] 😯

Ah, yes, the good ol’ Hidden Agenda®, don’tcha just love it? These idiots remind me of a doomsday cult: every time the appointed day for the End Of The World As We Know Itâ„¢ comes and goes, they just move the goalposts. In the last election, we were all warned about how the sky would fall if the Tories formed a government. I know I’ve pointed this out before, but I think some boneheads out there need a refresher. So here, along with a few additions, is my own little list of…

Catastrophes We Were Promised But Didn’t Get

1. Neither Stephen Harper nor any members of his caucus have eaten any babies.
2. Quebec has not separated from Canada.
3. The sun has not burned out.
4. Our health care system has not collapsed.
5. Homosexuals have not been rounded up into camps in the high arctic.
6. Women have not been forced to get pregnant in order to be denied access to abortions.
7. We have not become of 51st state of US of A.
8. We have not sent troops to Iraq, either.
9. The Charter of Rights and Freedoms has not been scrapped.
10. We have not withdrawn from the UN.
11. The sky has not fallen.
12. There have been no reliable reports (other than above) of the dead rising from their graves to feast upon the living.
13. We have not declared war on puppies.
14. Toronto has not been placed under martial law (although that might not be such a bad idea).
15. The polar ice caps have not melted.
16. The National Capital has not been moved to Head Smashed In Buffalo Jump.
17. The economy has not collapsed.
18. We still have no official State Religion; Christian, Satanic or otherwise.
19. Fun has not been outlawed.
20. No one has been executed for anything.
21. Banjo lessons are not a compulsory component of our educational curriculum.
22. No angels have tooted any trumpets, cracked any seals, or done anything else worrysome.
23. Petroleum is not included in the Canada Food Guide
24. Gun ownership is not mandatory (and here I was looking forward to that one)
25. etc, etc, ad nauseum…

Please, guys; on behalf of Canadians everywhere, from Lotusland to the Rock and Point Pelee to the Pole: quit being so STUCKING FOOPID and get some new material, ya friggin’ idjits! Seriously, we mean it. This is getting beyond old.

Clever buggers

Say what you want about Jumpin’ Jack Jerkweed and his Not Democratic Party, but at least one of them over there knows how the ‘net works. Much as I hate giving the Dippers credit for anything, I’m forced to admit that this is some darned good thinking:

OTTAWA — The New Democrats have cut a deal with Google and Yahoo to grab Internet traffic in a marketing ploy that has some online experts impressed.

Type the names Stephen Harper, Stephane Dion or Gilles Duceppe into the major search engines and an ad for NDP Leader Jack Layton pops up on the screen, along with the search results.

Google Adwords; gotta love ’em.

Who’s where? 12:20

Just in case anybody’s wondering where all the bestest blowhards’ll be today…

Stephen Harper

• MONTREAL: Young leaders’ breakfast at 8:45 a.m., 2200 Rue Mansfield
• News conference at 9:30 a.m. Mansfield Room 4, Cours Mont-Royal
• ST. EUSTACHE, Que.: Rally at 12:30 p.m. at Vignoble de la Riviere du Chene, 807 Riviere Nord
• HALIFAX: Evening arrival. No events scheduled.

Stephane Dion

• SAINT JOHN, N.B.: Pancake breakfast and annual general meeting at the Saint John riding association, 8:00 a.m. Media availability to follow at 8:50 a.m., Lilly Lake Pavilion, 55 Lake Dr. S
• Speaks at Saint John Board of Trade luncheon at 12:00 p.m. Media availability to follow at 12:30 p.m., Delta Brunswick Hotel, boardrooms A-B-C, 39 King St.
• THUNDER BAY, Ont.: Greets local candidates and makes brief remarks during a stopover at the Thunder Bay International Airport, 5:50 p.m., Thunder Bay International Airport Maintair Shell FBO, 316 Hector Dougal Way.

Jack Layton

• MONTREAL: Announcement with MP Thomas Mulcair and NDP Quebec team, 9:30 a.m., Victoria Square (corner Viger and Victoria Square Streets)
• Meets party supporters at Westmount-Ville-Marie riding headquarters, 2 p.m., 490 Sherbrooke St. W.

Gilles Duceppe

• HUNTINGDON, Que.: Visit to Maison Russet factory with mayor Stephane Gendron and Beauharnois-Salaberry candidate Claude Debellefeuille, 9:30 a.m. at 142 route 202. Briefing to follow outside at 10:15 a.m.
• VALLEYFIELD, Que.: Benefit spaghetti lunch, 11:30 a.m., 67 rue Academie.
• MONTREAL: Speech in Duceppe’s riding, Laurier-Sainte-Marie at 7:50 p.m., 1220 rue Sainte-Catherine Est.

Elizabeth May

• NEW GLASGOW, N.S.: Canada AM interview taping, 6:45 a.m.
• ANTIGONISH, N.S.: Setting up signs and greeting commuters, 7:30-9:00 a.m.
• Visits staff and patients, St. Martha’s Hospital, 10 a.m.
• Lunch, meets with students, 12 noon-1:30 p.m., St. Francis Xavier University cafeteria
• News conference on education issues, 2 p.m., St. Francis Xavier University campus, location to be announced.
• Campus Green Club event, 7:30-9:00 p.m., St. Francis Xavier University Student Union Building.

Le Leftbot Limbo 12:55

How low can ya go? How low can ya go? Just what the hell is the Catholic version of Islamophobia called, anyway? While I’m not so sure myself, I’m sure that Big Wheel Gilles knows the answer…

Bloc Québécois Gilles Duceppe seeks to portray the Conservatives as a party of narrow-minded views with a rightist religious agenda that should offend many Quebec voters. His evidence for such a patently false depiction? Nicole Charbonneau Barron, the Conservative candidate in the South Shore Montreal riding of St. Bruno-St. Hubert, belongs to Opus Dei, a Roman Catholic lay organization known for its adherence to traditional church doctrine.

Yeah, and before he goes to sleep at night, he always makes sure to check for albinos under his bed. Dickweed.

For those of you who might have read one too many Dan Brown novels, try checking out something a little closer to the source.

The cutlery is out 13:10

Gee whiz, I wonder who’s back it’ll end up buried in? What are the Librano$ up to this election, really? Are they looking to win? Are they looking to clear the way to dump Dion? You tell me…

The Liberal party moved last night to cancel its biennial convention in Vancouver in December, clearing the way for a full leadership vote next year should Stephane Dion fail win the Oct. 14 election. Sources say hotel reservations were ordered released this week as the national executive gathered to finalize the postponement decision.

No wonder Dion walks the way he does. If I had that bunch “watching my back,” I’d keep my butt cheeks clenched shut, too. Et tu, Brute?

A merry and joyous Christmas to you and all of yours, no matter who you are nor where you may be, as we gather to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

May the new year bring you peace and His blessings…

. . . dumber than a bag o’ hammers.

Yeah, you read that right. Here I’ve been, for over a week now, ranting my arse off about how folks should be keeping an eye out for Jesse Imeson, looking after each other, using common sense, watching where they shoot, and I can’t remember what else off the top of my head. And in all that, I cannot figure out how the hell it is that I somehow managed to overlook what should have been the most obvious no-brainer in the whole damned book. Luckily for all of us, some other folks haven’t suffered from my kind of tunnel vision:

Jesse Imeson — whose image has haunted Ontarians during a police manhunt that has lasted 10 days — could have a beard, moustache and a different hairstyle by now.

This makes the Windsor-area man’s distinct arm tattoos even more essential to the Canada-wide search, police said yesterday.

“Everyone has to be aware that his appearance may be changing,” said Windsor police Staff Sgt. William Donnelly.

“Unless he’s found a razor, he’s going to start getting several days of beard growth or stubble. Physical appearance and clothing can change, but his tattoos can’t,” Donnelly said.

Totally missed the boat there, didn’t I? So, the longer this bugger is on the lam, the less immediately recognizable his mug is going to be and the more useful it’s going to be to remember those tattoos of his. Something to keep in mind.

In the meantime, the cops are urging folks to keep in touch with friends and family who might be up at the cottage or living out in rural areas, just to make sure they’re all okay. But hey, you’ve been looking for an excuse to call aunt Emma anyways, right?

While we’re at it, for those who will be able to go:
The visitations for Bill and Helene Regier are today at the T. Harry Hoffman and Sons Funeral home in Dashwood (here’s a map, if you need it). Prayers will be held there at 1:30 this afternoon, with a K of C service at 6:30 tonight. A funeral mass will be held at Our Lady of Mount Carmel Roman Catholic Church at 11 a.m. tomorrow. I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it but I’m going to try.

And keep in mind that the cops are still looking for Bill’s 2006 GMC Sierra pickup with licence plate JK8 334. If you spot it, get on the horn PDQ and call one of these numbers (in order):

• 911 — the best option
• 1-888-310-1122 — the OPP
• *OPP — on your cell phone
• 1-877-584-8477 — the tip line set up specifically for Imeson

Dust ’em off and trot ’em out, boys and girls, because this one has to have earned at least a good-sized bunch of them. Yup, that’s right: a bunch of boneheads in Poland’s lower house are touting the idea of naming Jesus Christ the honourary king of Poland.

HEY, guys… what the hell are you thinking???

Not surprisingly, the Church in the overwhelmingly Catholic country is NOT amused with the idea:

The proposal “marks an overuse of religion for political goals,” Bishop Tadeusz Pieronek, a member of the Catholic Church Episcopate, said in an interview with the station. Archbishop Slawomir Glodz, also a member, told TVN24 “legislators should steer clear of things they have no idea about.”

I’m not big on it either. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure those guys’ hearts are in the right place; it’s their judgement that I find dubious. Perhaps they should have considered:

Jesus answered, “My kingdom is not of this world. If My kingdom were of this world, then My servants would be fighting so that I would not be handed over to the Jews; but as it is, My kingdom is not of this realm.”
– John 18:36

Yeah, I know this should have been posted yesterday but what can I say; I don’t blog when I’m sick as a dog. Flingin’ fluids fore and aft is not conducive to the production of readworthy materiel. 🙄 You’re welcome. But I’m back up and about, more or less, and it’s time to fire off what should have come out last night. Leading the list, from the “gee, what a big surprise” department, it turns out that Blochead Raymond Gravel didn’t have permission from the Vatican to run in the byelection in Repentigny after all, and has been “relieved of the exercise of sacramental duties,” according to Joliette Bishop Gilles Lussier. Seems that Church has some sort of thickheaded rules about the mingling of secular and clerical responsibilities. Seriously now; I’m not the only one that saw that coming, am I?

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