Category: CPC

… but I like this one a lot better than the idea I overheard someplace else:

Yes, it's clickable.

So what are you doing this Saturday?

… for a chilling conversation fragment to overhear at your local pub?

“It could be done. It would take fewer than a hundred men to storm parliament and gun every one of those bastards down.”

No, I’m not making that up. But I wish I was.

Anybody who doesn’t live in a cave already knows what kind of Machiavellian shit has been going down in Ottawa lately. Never mind that they just had their worst electoral performance in the history of confederation (an even worse showing than they put in for the Diefenbaker and Mulroney landslides), the God damned Librano$ still think that they should be the ones to govern the country.

So what if the Canadian people didn’t elect us? So what if the Canadian people not only gave the Tories another government, but a strengthened one at that? Screw the Canadian people. WE rule this country as our God-given right because WE are the Liberals! If those unwashed idiots are too stupid to elect us, then to hell with them.

Lets’ get something straight: I’m not scared of this so-called “coalition” getting their hands on the national tiller. If it happens, it won’t last and as far as I’m concerned, if the Grits want to pull the pin on that political grenade and swallow it, I say “bon appetit!” You want to know what does scare me? This does (think damned hard about it, too):

1. No matter what their protests to the contrary may be, this is about nothing more than greed and lust for power. Period. They couldn’t get elected and were threatened with having their lips pried loose from the public teat, so they plot the overthrow of the democratically elected government by coup d’etat. And that is exactly what it is.
2. There are men in this country who will be sorely tempted to take matters into their own hands. No, I’m not talking about drunken braggarts; I’m talking about dead serious sons of bitches who will not fool around. And if that genie gets out of its bottle, God help us…

Here’s hoping things get a lot more boring real soon.

… now it’s time for you to get out and do yours. Yes, folks, I just got back from casting my vote for the only party that I trust to run this country anymore. Now, it’s your turn.

So, if you live in London North Centre, get off the damned couch and get your butt to the nearest polling station and cast your vote for Paul Van Meerbergen. If you live someplace else, get out and vote for whoever happens to be your local Tory.

Let’s face it folks, the sooner we get a majority, the better (yes, I KNOW I’m being stupidly optimistic and I don’t give a damn).

Now all I have to do is wait for the results to start rolling in…

And, because we could all use a good laugh by now (thanks Paul):

The election was too close to call. Neither the Conservative Party nor the Liberal Party had enough
votes to win. There was much talk about ballot recounting, court challenges, etc., but a week-long ice fishing competition seemed the sportsmanlike way to settle things.

The candidate that caught the most fish at the end of the week would win the election. Therefore, it was decided that there should be an ice fishing contest between the two candidates to
determine the winner.

After much back and forth discussion, it was decided that the contest take place on a remote frozen lake in northern Manitoba . There were to be no observers present, and both men were to be sent out
separately on this isolated lake and return at 5 P.M. with their catch for counting and verification by a team of neutral parties.

At the end of the first day, Steven Harper returned to the starting line and he had ten fish. Soon, Dion returned and had no fish. Well, everyone assumed he was just having another ‘bad hair’ day or something and hopefully, he would catch up the next day. ( A do-over)

At the end of the 2nd day Harper came in with 20 fish and Dion came in again with none. That evening, Jack Layton & Elizabeth May got together secretly with Dion and said, ‘Dion, I think Steven Harper is a low-life, cheatin’ son-of-a-gun. I want you to go out tomorrow and don’t even bother with fishing.
Just spy on him and see just how he is cheating.’

The next night (after Steven Harper returns with 50 fish), Layton said to Dion, ‘Well, tell me, how is Steven Harper cheating?’

Dion replied, ‘Jack, you’re not going to believe this, but he’s cutting holes in the ice.’

PS-
For all of you who have been nagging for it, here’s my prediction:

• Conservatives: 160
• Librano$: 75
• Dippers: 22
• Blocheads: 51
• Greenz: dick all

That’s right: that’s how I think it’s gonna turn out. I can always edit it later to maintain my infallibility 😛

Some in the media have elected to piss and moan (surprise, surprise) about Prime Minister Harper having decided on the course of having “suspended news conferences for the duration of the election campaign.”  They act like he’s somehow gone and shut them out.  Poor babies.

I disagree.  I think there is really only one interview left to give in this campaign, and the PM damned well gave it:

If anybody out there is still wondering whether or not Stephen Harper is the best man to guide the economy through the coming uncertainty, just watch this.

Yes, I know it’s the Ceeb, but it’s still good. Even a blind squirrel finds a nut some days, right?

Now, I’ll be the first one to admit that Harper (surprise, surprise) doesn’t come off as even remotely warm and fuzzy here. Mansbridge also hits him with a few curve balls as well but the PM handles them damned well.
(more…)

I thought that these clowns were owned by the Toronto friggin’ Star, fer chrissakes!

Of all the things that I thought I’d see before this campaign was done (and my mind goes in some startling directions at times), this didn’t even come close to making the list.  Not even remotely.

I guess this is the part where I tell you what the hell I’m so stunned about, huh?

Okay, here we go.  Everybody and their dog knows that newspapers aren’t really neutral in their political leanings; that’s just the nature of the beast.  No, I’m not bellyaching about it.  Newspapers are private companies and their owners can run them as they wish.  If the rest of us don’t like it, we don’t buy their papers and they go tits-up.  It’s as easy as that.

Papers frequently come out on one side or another of an election, usually determined by the owners of the paper (see the note above), which is why you can usually make a safe bet on who they’re going to be endorsing.  This is why I was shocked as shit to find out that The Record — yes, The Record; as in “The Waterloo Record” — has come out and endorsed STEPHEN HARPER FOR PM!!

No, I am NOT making this shit up…

In contrast to the Liberals, the Conservatives, for all their failings, offer a safer, more credible approach to the economy. Months ago, aware of the looming crisis in the American economy, the Conservatives took action. They cut taxes across the board, to corporations, yes, but to ordinary Canadians too. We believe those cuts have helped buoy the Canadian economy. And while Harper was late in releasing his platform, it appears to be a prudent plan, offering targeted support for specific sectors of the economy.

There is reassurance, too, in Harper’s record over 2 1/2 years in power. He reached a welcome compromise with the Liberals so that Canadian troops can help bring aid and security to Afghanistan until 2011. Separatist sentiment in Quebec slumbers, thanks partly to Harper’s efforts to reach out to that province.

Nor have we seen the so-called “hidden agenda” of socially conservative initiatives. We see no indication Harper intends to resurrect national debates on abortion, the death penalty or same-sex marriage. And this only makes sense. Whatever Harper’s personal views are on these subjects, he knows that pushing them onto the House of Commons agenda would be political suicide.

On balance, Harper has put Canada in a good, even enviable position to weather the coming economic storm. Proof of this came this week when the International Monetary Fund predicted that Canada will lead the Group of 7 industrial nations in growth next year, with our gross domestic product estimated to rise by 1.2 per cent.

And what of the other choices? Well, neither the New Democratic Party nor the Greens appears to us as a viable option for government in this election. NDP Leader Jack Layton has fought an energetic, passionate campaign for which he will likely be rewarded with more seats. However, his plan to pound corporations with higher taxes and interfere with our free trade agreements would be economically disastrous. As for Elizabeth May’s Greens, as much as they belong in the political landscape, their call for new corporate taxes and distrust of free trade are not what Canada needs. The Greens deserve a seat or seats, not a government.

This, at least, is how this newspaper’s editorial board sees things.

Okay, Lord, you can come and get me now.  There’s nothing else to see down here… 😯